Category: Seasons

  • Week 6, 2026

    Who did the Curse Wheel curse?

    • Atlanta Falcons (#14)

    Did the Curse Wheel curse succeed?

    • YES; the Falcons lost to the Chicago Bears 31-23.

    How Bad Was the Curse?

    • Even though the Falcons did ultimately lose, it was actually kinda close at the end there. The Falcons managed to score 16 points in the last 10 minutes of the 4th Quarter… but it didn’t help them in the end.
    • Maybe the most embarrassing play of the game was the muffed punt catch by Falcons WR Zachariah Branch, putting the Bears at the Falcons 10 yard line, which they then easily sneezed it in. And hey, looks like the Bears managed to win by one score. What a coincidence!
    • Another fumble happened with 1:48 left in the 3rd Quarter when the Bears kicked off to the Falcons, which was recieved by Branch again, and OOPS good ol’ butterfingers fumbled again! It was recovered by the Bears who ultimately turned that into a Field Goal.
    • But hey, despite causing the Bears to add 10 to their score, the Falcons did manage to claw their way back into a one score game. Now the Falcons got the ball, there’s over 3 minutes left in the 4th Quarter, plenty of time to march down the field to try to tie it up. It’s 3rd and 16, and… Falcons QB Michael Penix Jr. gets sacked and fumbles. Bears recover the ball, end of game.

    Current Curse Win Percentage: 0.286 (2/7 teams cursed)

    Leave a comment on this tragedy:

  • Week 5, 2026

    Who did the Curse Wheel curse?

    • Baltimore Ravens (#9)

    Did the Curse Wheel curse succeed?

    • NO; the Ravens defeated the Atlanta Falcons 30-23.

    How Bad Was the Curse?

    • The now-reformed Bless Wheel has now officially blessed yet another victim. This has been the second time the Bless Wheel has Blessed the Baltimore Ravens.
    • Jokes aside, there was actually a legitimate chance that the Curse would’ve finally been successful for once. The game basically starts with a Ravens fumble and the Falcons bringing it in for a Touchdown. Capping things off, the Falcons were up on the Ravens 23-15 after having just gotten a field goal with 2:25 left in the 4th Quarter. At best, this placed the Falcons at a 97.6% chance of victory, while the Ravens had never led during regulation.
    • Once the Ravens got the ball back, they almost immediately got a touchdown with just 40 seconds left AND successfully got the 2-pt Conversion, tying the game up 23-23.
    • However, after the Falcons got the ball back and with 27 seconds left in the 4th Quarter, Falcons QB Michael Penix, Jr, got sacked hard, causing him to be basically pulled from the game, and the game went into overtime.
    • The Ravens managed to get the ball first and ate up like 7 minutes to get a touchdown, bringing them to their first lead in the entire game: 30-23. With Penix out, the Falcons brought in QB Tua Tagovailoa; Tua started to drive with a great 20 yard pass, only to get intercepted in the next play, sealing the game.
    • As we all know, the Curse Wheel works in mysterious ways. I feel like the mystery this year is that it’s cursing the other teams. To be fair tho, at least the Curse Wheel has a better record than either the Titans or the Chargers.

    Current Curse Win Percentage: 0.167 (1/6 teams cursed)

    Leave a comment on this tragedy:

  • Week 4, 2026

    Who did the Curse Wheel curse?

    • San Francisco 49ers (#1)

    Did the Curse Wheel curse succeed?

    • NO; the 49ers defeated the Denver Broncos 24-14.

    How Bad Was the Curse?

    • Ok it’s 100% obvious that someone switched the Curse Wheel to be the “Bless Wheel” this season, because basically everyone has beaten it this year. Maybe the NFL has caught on?
    • At best you can say that the Curse kept the game close for the first half, when the 49ers finally tied things up 3-3 with 1:36 left in the 2nd Quarter. And Denver kept it within a one-score game with 2:29 left in the 4th Quarter. But the Niners won in the end, and there was never a time the Broncos has a greater than 50% chance of winning.
    • Sure 49ers FB Kyle Juszczyk was injured before the game, but the Broncos lost three players to injuries during the game: CB Pat Surtain II, CB Riley Moss and WR Pat Bryant. So the Broncos was really the cursed team here.

    Current Curse Win Percentage: 0.200 (1/5 teams cursed)

    Leave a comment on this tragedy:

  • Week 3, 2026

    Who did the Curse Wheel curse?

    • Spin Again
    • Las Vegas Raiders (#10)

    Did the Curse Wheel curse succeed?

    • NO; the Raiders defeated the New Orleans Saints 35-27.

    How Bad Was the Curse?

    • (deep breath) “The Raiders were cursed AND beat the curse” is a sentence that has never been uttered by humanity, until now.
    • Like with previous weeks, the cursed teams actually were in a pretty piss poor position and were poised to lose. After halfway in the 3rd quarter, the Saints managed to score back-to-back touchdowns due to a Raiders kickoff fumble, pushing their lead up to 27-16 and giving the Raiders a 11.2% chance of winning.
    • However, in the fourth quarter the Saints suffered FOUR turnovers in each their possessions; a fumble and interception brought the Raiders up to 35-27, with two further fumbles sealing the deal.
    • I dunno about you, but I think someone switched the Curse Wheel to be the “Bless Wheel” this season… or maybe the “Spin Again” option inverts the Curse Wheel’s powers??

    Current Curse Win Percentage: 0.250 (1/4 teams cursed)

    Leave a comment on this tragedy:

  • Week 2, 2026

    Who did the Curse Wheel curse?

    • Kansas City Chiefs (#666)
    • Jacksonville Jaguars (#4)
    • Philadelphia Eagles (#10; after attempting to dislodge the wheel)

    Did the Curse Wheel curse succeed?

    • NO; the Chiefs defeated the Indianapolis Colts 33-30.
    • YES; the Jaguars lost to the Denver Broncos 13-20.
    • NO; the Eagles defeated the Tennessee Titans 24-20.

    How Bad Was the Curse?

    • The Chiefs won, but BOY was it close! Looks like the Colts are STILL catching strays.
    • The Jaguars had a 90.3% chance of winning in the 3rd Quarter (when it was 13-3), only to completely collapse in the 4th Quarter after the Broncos scored 14 unanswered points.
    • The Eagles actually had a pretty good chance of losing against the TENNESSEE TITANS in the 4th Quarter, who had a 78.4% chance to win when they were up 20-17 on the Eagles with less than 2 minutes left on the clock. But the Eagles managed to come back and score a touchdown in the literal last seconds. Almost got ’em!
      • Perna doesn’t count this one, unless he changes his mind later.

    Current Curse Win Percentage: 0.333 (1/3 teams cursed)

    Leave a comment on this tragedy: